The media loves nothing better than a good pandemic. Makes for a big news day, and the more they can fan the flames of panic, they can stretch that into a week, maybe two, and if they get lucky… months. They say they don’t, but they do. Listen to their choice of words. The last few days I’ve been hearing catch phrases like “shelter in place”, and the “new normal”. This isn’t the new normal! It’s not normal at all, and to call it the new normal would infer that it’s here to stay. It’s not here to stay!!! This is a moment in time. As for “shelter in place”, that’s what you hear when it’s too late to escape in front of a hurricane, or make it to a basement in the face of a tornado! We aren’t sheltering in place from an approaching storm. We are prudently keeping a distance from our neighbors if we suspect we might be sick. We’re giving those who provide our food and supplies a chance to catch up. We’re doing our best not to spread this virus. I live in hurricane country. I know what it means to “shelter in place” and this isn’t it! That phrase only serves to conjure up visions of “War of the Worlds”, “The Zombie Apocalypse”, and creates the panic shopping we are seeing now. Besides, if people are “sheltering in place”, that place must be WalMart, or Target!
It all started with toilet paper, not food. A phenomenon that baffles me. When the CDC announced that it was a good plan to be prepared for 30 “days”, people took that to mean 30 “months” of toilet paper! I realize that the Coronavirus is serious, but this is a respiratory illness, and though it can have a gastrointestinal component I don’t think you really need eight cases of toilet paper to deal with it! I walked down the paper product aisle at the market last week and saw that all the toilet paper was gone! All of it, except four packages of Greenwise. I have never looked, but either Greenwise is very expensive, or people don’t like the idea of recycled toilet paper. I actually felt a little sorry for those four lonely packages. I need not to have worried though, because a man quickly stepped in and swept all four of them up, cradling them in his arms as if he were holding precious quadruplets! Astounding! Now the store was “officially” out, and the hoarding continues! Perhaps the CDC should have been more specific. If you have to go out and buy a freezer, or move your car to the driveway, so you can warehouse supplies in your garage…you bought too much!
I had to go to the store today. It’s hard not to buy more than you need with the vultures circling overhead! Empty shelves leave Americans in a panic, and though people now seem to be buying soup by the case, canned goods, and frozen vegetables, nobody is desperate enough to reach for that bag of frozen okra. As I saw four boxes of my hair color in stock, I had to refrain from buying more than one, reminding myself that others need to cover that grey too. It’s not all about me!
My kids will tell you I was a hand sanitizer nazi long before anyone knew about COVID-19. They know not to ask me for a stick of gum, because I don’t chew gum, but if they need hand sanitizer they don’t start with, “Mom, do you “have” hand sanitizer?” They simple ask, “Can I borrow your hand sanitizer?” Consequently the shortage of this staple has been a problem for me, and I’m trying not to hyperventilate. I’m pretty sure I’ll make it through with soap and water. After all, I wasn’t born in this century. It hasn’t always been around, but I didn’t say I was going to like it!
Be good neighbors. Stop stockpiling! If you do, there will be plenty for everyone. Be careful around the elderly. They are truly the ones at risk for serious consequences. This is not armageddon, unless we make it to be. This is NOT the new normal. This is a moment in time, so snap out of it!!
Oh look! Oreos are buy one get one free! I should stock up!! What?