What’s with those annoying car alarms? They are always sounding off around 5:00 a.m. or during Mass, or practically anytime you really don’t want them too. The reason I know this is my neighbor’s alarm has given us all a wake up call the last three mornings!
To all you habitual car alarm setters, I don’t think they do what you think they do! They’re suppose to scare off any would be car thief, but we’re so conditioned into believing that the alarm is an accident I’d be surprised if a good Samaritan actually hasn’t helped a car thief get the darn thing shut off and on his merry way in your car!
I don’t use mine. I don’t even know how to set it. What I do know is if I did, I would never figure out how to disarm it, and then I will be one of “those” people! Have you noticed that? Is there a special code, or sequence required to turn it off? Everyone seems to fumble with that part. One click for on, 4 pages of instructions on how to get it off!
Who invented this thing that seemed like a good idea, but had unintended consequences? Well, it turns out it was a convict in Denver in 1913. Hmmm….didn’t say what he was in prison for. And how many cars were there in 1913 that stealing them was an issue? Like somebody wouldn’t notice that the only car in the neighborhood was missing and now you’re driving it?! I wasn’t able to find out who decided to make alarms standard in cars today. Probably classified. Who decided it was a good idea to make them so sensitive that if you sneezed while walking by they would start honking and flashing lights as if you had just won a huge jackpot in Vegas, only you didn’t! You did win the stares of passersby judging you for not knowing how to disarm your alarm. “It’s not my car!!!!”
My son and I accidentally discovered a very effective anti-theft device. Of course it only works if you are short, which fortunately I am. Too bad for you. When Ben graduated from college he and I packed up his car with all his college belongings and set off for home, via Washington D.C. I figured I’d be doing most of the driving and he would do the navigating. He’s quite good with maps. So, I put the seat where I needed it to be and then packed, shoved, and squeezed things into the back seat and trunk. What was left over got left behind. When we ran into car trouble in North Carolina we stopped at the service center at Wal-Mart. Have you ever noticed how tall people are in North Carolina? Giant-like really and they insisted that I could not drive that car into their service bay. They had to do it. Not going to happen! Oh, they tried, but I’m 5 ft tall. There wasn’t a single guy in that shop that was under 6 ft and that seat wasn’t going to budge back for nothing! Nobody could get in it! Rules are rules, so they worked on that car right where I left it. Out in the hot, steamy sun! As long as the thief is taller than you are and you’re using your back seat as a storage unit, you are golden!
My suggestion, get The Club, or get a club. Worked for Teddy Roosevelt. The first option is less confrontational, the second more satisfying. Probably more prudent to go with the first. Hey, this is America. Do what you will, but if your alarm goes off by accident, and it will, I reserve my right to roll my eyes at you.